Saturday, March 6, 2010

So the ball dropped....

We had such high hopes for this blog when we started it, but sadly we both dropped the ball. Our families, jobs and other life happenings just got in the way. If anyone is still reading this, we do want to try again....keep you posted on the details....

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Kindred Spirits

I think Elizabeth Gilbert is a kindred spirit. This is the second time I have enjoyed reading about her travels in Eat, Pray, Love and I feel as if I should take off to Italy and join her. Well, in theory at least. I mean, she is obviously not still there and I cannot take off to Italy. It is just not financially or situationally feasible. That said, it is not that I wouldn’t love to travel that, but that is not the point.

I feel like I am at a point in my life where I must figure things out yet again. The economy is in the tank, we are broke and I am working at a job that pays nothing.
So I have been asking myself the following questions:
• What do I want to change? How can it happen?
• Where do I want to be professionally?
• What are my goals?

For now I am going to focus on one question, my profession. I feel like I have struggled with it for some time. Always, when I was younger, I remember thinking that I wanted to be a teacher. However, when I got older my goals shifted a bit. I really wanted to be a writer. And I did it for a while. First at a magazine, and then I freelanced. And you know what? I hated it.

It didn’t make any sense to me then and it doesn’t now. I love to write. I love to read. I love books, magazines, newspapers - everything with the written word intrigues me. So why did I hate writing for a paycheck?

It hit me today. I wasn’t writing about anything that I actually cared about. As a result of this epiphany here is my next self imposed assignment: change that. Find something I love to write about and do it as often as I’d like. Maybe it will be a new job, or maybe I will start a book….I don’t know. The point is that I am going to start somewhere. I’ll let you know where it takes me.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Mars versus Venus

Last night I encountered a major opportunity to put my "not talking" lessons to use. My husband and I got into an argument. It wasn't anything major, yet it was enough to piss us both off. The details of the original issue aren't important and are fuzzy in my mind at best. But it is funny how one issue can lead to all the old problems being brought back up. It got to the point where neither of us could remember what we were arguing about.

As men and women do, my husband and I hear things differently. Sometimes I think it is a big joke that God played on women, pairing men and women together. Men just think differently than we do. I take something the wrong way and get hurt, and it seems like my husband just does not care. He gets distant, and I get mad.
The distance just elevates my anger. It pushes my buttons. As a result, I cannot stop talking and asking questions. These actions push his buttons and he pulls even farther away. It is a frustrating and annoying circle. And we have always seemed to be stuck.

At the end last night, I ended up going for a walk, alone and angry. (Side note: This did of course take my mind off the walking alone issue and at least something good came out of the argument). About a half hour after getting home we finally both got over it and let it go. It may sound silly but that is major progress for us. I have to admit that I am not good at letting things go when I'm hurt or mad. In the moment of my frustration, the advice this book has given me is the last thing on my mind. But I will keep trying and reading, only good can come of it. I think.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

I Need Additional Directions

I have decided that my road map to self help needs to change. While the books that we are following are good, I just don’t feel that they are all that I need. In an effort to find the rest of what I need, and the direction that my self help quest should go I am re-reading an old favorite. Eat, Pray, Love. If you haven’t heard of it you should. It is empowering.

I will get back to some daily assignments, but I had to add this book to the venture as well. And my next assignment is going to be self imposed: Find a balance. I need to figure out how to be a full time worker, a mom and a wife. Millions of women do it every day, but I am struggling. Does anyone have any advice?


Monday, January 25, 2010

Assignment: Learn from men and walk away from a dirty kitchen

I am usually obsessive about how my kitchen looks, so I knew that this assignment would be exceedingly difficult for me. My husband and two children eat constantly, and I feel like everything is always a mess. I seriously may have OCD, and not just when it comes to the kitchen. If I walk by any part of my house and see any tiny crumb, stain or other mess I will drop what I am doing to clean the entire area. The funny this is that even with my slight obsession; my house is still not as spotless as you would think. Maybe it is the uphill battle I am fighting due to having a thriving family.
I have tried to channel my obsessive cleanliness constructively, and it has paid off in way of a good business. I have found that I am able to relieve a lot of my compulsions by cleaning offices and vacant houses for a living. The pay is good and best of all I get to make sure that every place that I leave is clean from top to bottom.

Back to my assignment for the day: walking away from a dirty kitchen. I have failed this miserably. I tried, I really did. I left dishes in the sink and on the counter. I tried to ignore them. But honestly this lasted all of maybe 20 minutes. I guess that is good for me. I cleaned and organized it all and continued to do so promptly upon every mess for the remainder of the day. So all in all, I get a big F for this part of my day. I would like to say that I will continue to work on being more laid back with a messy house, but if I am going to be honest I will just admit to keeping the crazy that I have had for most of my life. Besides I think I would miss this freak part of me, everyone has their own form of crazy but not everyone admits to it. It is my "freak flag" and I am proud to fly it!

On another note, I did walk all by myself again today, and it is getting easier and I am starting to love it. So maybe I don't get an "F" for my whole day after all.

My Personal Juggling Act

I dropped the ball. I was supposed to write a blog post yesterday, and I did not. I would like to extend a public apology to my sister: I am sorry Nicole. Here is my excuse……I just didn’t feel well, and I was having personal issues about starting work full time.

That’s right folks, you heard me, I am working full time at a preschool/daycare. Thank goodness it is only temporary. The job is fine really; it is just a long day. Maybe I need to add a new element to my list of skills that I need to focus on during self help - trying to juggle my time.

Me=Mom, Wife, Teacher, Daughter. How do I fit in all of my roles and still have time for me and what I want?
Self help entry to follow…..Thanks for listening!

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Supporting the Girls

My assignment for the last 48 hours was to invest in a supportive and uplifting bra. Supposedly, a great bra will make you feel thinner. To find out I drove myself down to the local Kohl’s to check out the selection. My budget was tight, a mere $15, and there was a lot to choose from. After too long in the dressing room, I was finally able to find a cute color and a comfortable fit.

So, before I tell you what I thought this needs to be said: I did not think a great bra would make a large difference. Boy was I wrong! This bra has given me confidence, a great look and most importantly….support! I love this bra! I wish I could go back to the store and buy six more! I guess I need to save my money.