I cannot seem to grasp this book’s concept of not talking to my spouse, and trust me I have been trying. The husband and I got into a disagreement recently, nothing huge but it was notable enough for me to want to just keep on talking and talking about us and my feelings. After all, if I don't tell him how I am feeling how will he know? He can’t read my mind, and he needs to know when I think he has been a jerk and should apologize.
These are the same thoughts that rush through my mind after, or even during, every disagreement. Lately, I have turned to my chosen self help book for answers. And here is what I have learned……..My husband might be right more often than I give him credit for.
What an eye opener! I swear this book was written about my marriage. I feel like he doesn't want to try and doesn't care about me, and my husband apparently feels like I am never happy and that I want him to be more like a girl. We end up blaming each other.
I really want this book to help us learn how to get back the connection we had when we were first together. We actually communicated back then. Maybe it was because we had no issues and everything was new. I’m not sure. However, what I do know is that I really do miss how we were. And talking will not help us to get there. I am learning I need to try to stop verbalizing so much of my frustration or disappointment with my husband. It really makes him feel like a failure and that is not my intention at all!
On a side note: I have been trying to go for a walk everyday to get in better shape and relieve stress. Problem is that I no longer have dogs and it is too cold to push the baby in the stroller. So that leaves me walking alone. All alone. I feel incredibly ridiculous walking alone; however, my pants are starting to fit better so I am motivated. Now only if I can get passed the habit of fidgeting with my phone or Ipod every time a car passes trying to make it look like I have a purpose and am not just walking aimlessly all alone. I am making progress and it feels good to work on these things. So much to improve and so little time! ---Nicole
Friday, January 22, 2010
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